Needles Next Ride

6 am and Eve had a job interview - or at least that was what she liked to think of it as hopefully.

A one hour segment had become available in Community Programming at the Southport Radio Broadcasting where she had recorded six months earlier, with the winning proposal of a semi-scientific spiritual call-in chat show.

All this time later they just now had finally got back to her, needing to fill the 7 am spot that had become vacant with short notice.

“Must not be late” she emphatically reminded herself - setting two clocks and four alarms, to be certain of at least one actually working on time. The spirits were known for playing tricks with their settings - waking her at midnight, or cancelling them out entirely.

A strange unease came over Eve as she drove through the lane and out onto the open road. She dismissed this as simply being ‘nerves’ and rehearsed in her head what could be a great place to begin. Unbeknown to her, her passenger was back seated behind - Needles had waited all night expectantly for the next ride.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Demon in the House

“Perhaps a demon entered the house?”

“This sounds about right - it is the only explanation for sure. For nought else could have torn a character so.”

Bewildered and doleful, the two then cleaned the area as best they might. Dragging the carcasses to the front door for collection.

“I am so sad my friend to be witness to such a goodness turned bad. I loved the gentility of those two, and everything they did - in sleeping and in wake - was together.”

“A rabid malady? contaminating their wits? in a mixed reality?”

“Yes, for sure”, Tindle agreed. “It is a vexation of dogs as is well known.”

“No”, he paused for consideration.

“I think it was demonic after all - because I did see one evil sprite earlier lurking at the front door, yet." 

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Animal Rage

As quick as the spark ignites, as unpredictably as love is lost, or as fast as the sunrise fades, Paul set his teeth into Peter’s neck and tore its vein bare open.

Peter pulled back, increasing his wound, and with a gurgling yelp he doubled back and bit Paul’s ear clean away.

Jonathon had, only moments before, casually filled the dogs' platters with their morning feed.

Tindle, as tall as he was, was terrified at this unforeseen anger, and did not wish to be caught in the dogs' savage tussle. He backed his way to the door and took the switch from its stand.

Jonathon was calling to them to stop. In but three combative minutes the rage was over with Paul quite dead. In five, Peter lay beside him, expired also.

“What on an ungodly earth caused that mayhem?” Tindle said - nervously still holding fast to the broom, having done nothing with it but grasp it tight.

“I’ve not seen such a thing before”, agreed Jon who had worked with all manner of animal. He was perplexed at the rage between what was formerly the best of companions.

“But they were as brothers.” remarked Tindle, who secretly was relieved that the two had not savaged Jon or himself before their uncommon death.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Dark Déjà vu

A sheet of silken cloud spread across a quiet sky. It was a perfect day for contemplation.

Puck had escaped the angry crowd at Eve’s apartment - realizing that he was not winning any friends or favour on that day.

He had reflected also, how she had just endured an horrific episode, that even though he had reversed the circumstances, this happening - the almost car crash - would have worn at her nerves inwardly.

Infrequently most mortals know of this dark déjà vu - where, one becomes exhausted for seemingly no reason whatsoever, and feel stalked by a happenstance, one that truly might have been.

Eve was a stoic at the core - and as such, she often managed to find a clear perspective as to where she was. But she was also only human, or so he thought.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

In Fatima's Absence

“We should leave, we should go look for her,” Tindle insisted, repeating this daily mantra since he had arrived.

Jonathon had fed and watered the hounds for three weeks, and still Fatima had not returned ...

“She would not leave them, I know she would not abandon their care”, he said belatedly, stroking Peter’s head affectionately.

“I agree”, replied Tindle quietly - who was sensitive to his new friend’s calamity.

In his imagining he had thought Fatima to be the most worthy and virtuous match of all.

“I know not what to do going forward”, said Jonathon explaining his vacancy, as he likewise stroked the scruff of the mastiff’s crown.

“There is none here to feed them, the sick can hardly procure their own meat and meal.” Tindle was persuasive to his doubt.

“Then we shall have to take them with us, and they can search alongside us.”

“That they can. Then, needs must - we finally have a plan."

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Blue Leather Boots

Brittle leaves flew around his feet, alike to a huddle of dancing popadoms. They crackled and crunched beneath his blue leather boots, becoming a swirling confetti in the wind.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

The Light Feeds the Eyes

The eyes are joyous when they see beauty.
The eyes become healthy, and focused when they are happy.
The light feeds the eyes.
They commune with the outer landscape -
with the colors, with the textures, with lines and their graduations.

There have been painters who have departed from the ordinary joys of what they see, and through interpretation, they commit to canvas a distorted narration of color and line. And these artists have lost their eyesight because of the anomaly of brain and sight, and that they no longer love what they see, but rather seek to change it - confusing their own eyes thereby.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Soul in Review

Most of us are familiar with the concept of reviewing our lives after death. This experience - or series of experiences - is where the soul recalls the events in succession with rapidity, from many different angles: being able to watch themselves, from birth up until the moment at hand, in a cascade of moments, one by one, yet all at once - to see their lives as lived, and also, of the impact that life has had on others. Most times, this sophisticated recollection, is an invaluable experience taking in the realities of those to whom we have had an effect on. And this is felt, by the soul who is in review. It is known, it is experienced, sequenced, and clear.

Needles, was given such a revelatory experience - only his memory (when recovered) went back far further than a single lifetime - in fact it spanned tens of thousands of years. And, for the first time in a very long time, his consciousness was clear again - and he knew once again who he was.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Ectoplasmic Glamour

And so alike to a sheath of frost, a mantle over the morning grass, there suddenly appeared six strange figures lit with the ectoplasmic glamour Puck threw over them: a blue light filled the room and Eve saw more clearly the six characters that had travelled closely by her for many years now.

The oddest change happened to the elderly Dwarf, Needles. As the luminescent shower rained down on the group in the corner, the small fry who had been standing with them, watching on, was covered also, and finding it quite invigorating.

Einstein, as Puck called him ironically, instantly became a transformed being, with a rush and a flash and a cataclysm, of truth and memory; his brain was on fire, his mind was enlivened, and rational thought was restored.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

The Science of Ectoplasmic Sheathing

The science behind the ectoplasmic sheathing of ghosts was rather simple, insofar as it can give shape and body to what formerly could not be seen in the physical world. The contrasting emanations on some level can become, for a time, palpable, however not least always are visual. His plan was to shower the ephemeral forms with the tacky elastic goo which would give them shape for a very short time.

It was formerly thought that ectoplasm was made up from the subtle attributes of the medium who produced it. This was only partly true, and equally not true. Ectoplasm itself came directly from the elemental beings in the medium’s employ, yet Puck did not need such assistance as he was himself an elemental being of a kind.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Seeing Ghosts

"I don’t know why you feel that you have to do that - I can see them perfectly well, without you doing whatever you are doing, thank you.” Her voice sounded a little strained, and largely annoyed - Eve really wished that this bothersome spirit would leave her apartment immediately.

Puck had come up with the bright idea that if Eve could see what the ghosts in the corner really looked like, perhaps she would not be so enamoured with them. Perhaps, he thought, she might actually be frightened, and choose more carefully the company she frequented with.

He needed to find out a bit more about this young woman. He simply could not bring himself to stop visiting her. Puck could sense some unfinished business … and needed to discover what that might be - his intuition nagged him to persist.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses, AZLANDER Series

Three Damp Days of Confinement

Jon was drowsy, for the three days had left him faint with the ordeal. There was, ever present, during this confinement, the constant terror of dropping down further, or being there forever, buried in the sludge beneath for all eternity … and all the while he had no reckoning also of what had become of his beloved Fatima.

As for the earring, Tindle asked how he came of it, and so the discussion had naturally emptied into small facts and merriments.

Likewise Jonathon had his choice fragments and episodes of setback to relate. He had come to expect all things to never be constant, but to change, to threaten, to contest him, and to surprise - this was exactly how he had found his life in the last few weeks and days - and he was just grateful now to be out in the sunshine after his three damp days of confinement.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses, AZLANDER Series

Earring Recognised

The impoverished are rarely surprised by life’s events. From an early age those who are used to doing without, become accustomed to all manner of both setbacks and miracles alike.

And so it was that when Tindle discovered from Jon that he had personally seen the same man to whom he was meant to meet with, and had in fact carried his head, for a time, it did not surprise Tindle at all. Not at all. The subject had come up because of the earring that Jonathon wore - being the first thing that Tindle had seen when he had reached down and caught Jon by the arm - being tall enough and long enough to do this safely bringing the lad out into the open air once again.

Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses AZLANDER Series

A Unicorn Lopped By

Tindle had been entrusted with the silver from the entire town. You could say that it was risky to give a youth the bundle that was their entire welfare for a season to come, so obviously dangerous that he should carry such a wealth about him. However, because of his great height, they were hopeful that it was safe to do so - and lacked the means to do anything else.

However the emissary he had been due to meet with had been taken. Competing merchants from Italia had charged this Commissioner of the North with corruption, and he had lost his once successful life to the executioner.

They had accused him of piracy, and charged his convoy of being illegitimate and therefore illegal; to then subsequently sequester it for their own use, taking over the ship, killing the men, and seizing the goods.

Just then a unicorn lopped by. Unicorns always appear when least expected. They are rarely seen, but if you catch sight of them in the side of your eye, or even feel that a Unicorn has brushed past you - or perhaps hear him gallop past you - this is a very auspicious sign, because all Unicorns herald a happy change.

Neither Tindle or Jonathon saw the creature leap past them ever so elegantly, yet a few sparks of light came their way, showering into the well, sprinkling the rocks and foliage around them.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self, Second Guesses, Azlander Series

The Hairless Tradesmen of the North

It was Tindle who had finally come to his [Jon's] rescue. He had been staying within the community, not because he was diseased or near dying, but because he was considered to be an outcast. 

Nathanius Tindle frightened ordinary people: as a child he appeared quite normal, but then he grew and kept growing until he stood over over seven feet tall and was thus conspicuously different. Being so large had not gone well for him as it might have in some other place or time.

On the cusp of the equinox Tindle would leave for supplies, negotiating their delivery with the hairless tradesmen of the North, who with one compact consignment distributed the agreed wares a moon month after the barter. This seasonal arrangement went beyond the grandfather’s recollection when neither village from either port ever thought that there was risk or worry in such transaction.

Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses, Azlander Series

Charismatic Captor

Jonathon had to wait three days before anyone had come by, to then help hoist him up and out of the well. 

During this time Fatima had lost herself also. On the first day Jon went missing she left for the town to go look for him … and did not return.

Fatima had met with a charismatic captor, who had beguiled her into a faraway journey, in which she, in her innocence, became subject to his magic, and had been restrained from ever returning back to Jon alive.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Reaping the Whirlwind

Everyone knows in Faerie to avoid the whirlwind when it is billowing throughout the realm.

On ancient maps you can see the faces of the north wind and of the south, of the east, and of the west, blowing across the parchment, with good nature, showing their characters to be most noble.

But the whirlwind has not such a divine pedigree. Its voracity will pull one into a dark heart with a centrifugal force, and draw you into its whirring depths - often sucking the victim into the portal of its dark matter.

The whirlwind of itself holds no malcontent. It is but the dark angel of Karmic rage. The wraith of cause and effect. The veritable sword of Damocles, the cosmic sweeper collecting up the mess of Mankind .

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Dark Well

A little bird had told him that it was not safe to collect the water at night - it had tried to caution Jonathon, however, not being conversant in bird speak he had ignored the chattering, and persisted.

Jonathon had leaned into the well a little too far and when the wet pail had slipped from his grasp, and as he instinctively moved forward to catch it, he landed flat onto a cross beam some five foot down.

There was a crude fretwork of wooden beams holding the sides of the hole from collapsing, and Jonathon had managed to hold onto one above his head, whilst balancing on the wood beneath. The grimy footing was only inches wide.

He thought of Fatima, and of how he loved her so. It had only been a handful of weeks they had spent together, after she had found him at this very well, at a time when he had lost all direction.

He wished he was on the other side of its wall now. Frightened to move, lest he would slip down even further, he began to call out, even though he knew there would be no one to hear him. This community never ventured outdoors at night, as they were generally too vexed with whatever malady confined them there. He was, by their standards, the fittest amongst them. It would be a long cold wait until morning.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

His Maria

A young woman was sitting on a stone seat at the far edge of the garden. With the light behind her, he could see through the linen dress draped over her shoulders, a fine form defined in haloed silhouette.

She smiled with recognition, as he made his way to her side.

“Come lie beside me Jacob”, she said taking his knobbled hand, and placing it in her lap.

He could see now that she resembled the marble statue of a young woman reclining over the tomb that she and he was sitting upon. It was not a garden seat after all, but a slab that covered a coffin.

“Maria? my Maria?”

“Heaven is good and kind, dear husband. And I have waited now so long for you. Step out of your decrepitness and come to me now, as you have done before.”

He pulled away. He wanted to be with her, yet he was frightened. The wraith took up some of the morning light and became semi transparent, her presence was thinning. She looked at him lovingly before vanishing completely.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Broken Fiddle

The old man looked down at the splintered wood of his violin and cursed the diddle-o under his breath. His son had never respected him - and now he had taken his only joy. Life would never be the same. “My heart is aching for my beloved fiddle.” He cursed again.

His only chair was in splinters also. The tall grain bag had been split and scattered the floor. There was blood on the tiles - Jacob’s blood - from where he had hit his head.

“That boy was never any good”, he muttered to himself.

The sun was beginning to rise, and he did not feel cold of it, but rather strangely warm. The elderly man fumbled for the latch, the door was already open.

Outside, the air smelt of Spring. A golden light permeated the garden, and lit the flowers, nudging them to open. Jacob blinked at its brightness.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Toast

“You can see me?” he [Puck] asked, this time dissolving into their common space and floating up into the ceiling.

“Yes, I can still see you” she said, now a little sarcastically.

“What about now?” he asked, surrounding himself with the strongest glamour he had to muster.

“Yep” Eve said, taking off her shoes and walking into the hall to find her indoor slippers.

Puck followed her.

Eve went into her small kitchen and dropped two slices of grainy bread into the silver toaster. Puck followed.

She put the kettle on, and he was still hanging around.

Eve was well used to spirits shadowing her, but was beginning to notice something very different about this one. She looked over her shoulder … he was eating her toast.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Shooing the Ghosts

~ Truth is the nucleus to which all philosophies circulate. ~

Crowded in the corner was a huddle of ghosts. They seemed to be watching his every move. Puck got up from the couch to shoo them on.

“Stop! what are you doing?”

“A little house-cleaning - you seem to have some unwanted guests.” Puck said well pleased with himself.

Eve objected. “I don’t know what you think you are doing here, but they are my friends. The only unwanted visitor is you.”

She instantly felt she had gone a bit far in saying this, but he had startled her. By all appearances this ghost had got a little taller, and somewhat bossy.

The group in the corner moved in a little closer. Needles was amongst them. There was a collection of great aunts and uncles, and a few unrelated spirits, who Eve had recently met during readings.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Black Harvest

“I am Smithy - Jon Smithy - from down yon.” He pointed to the valley in the distance where the village of the Haverlock shouldered. He had stayed the night by the well, having no particular direction to travel.

“I am Fatima.” she hesitated, biting her lip and crinkling her brow, she went on “Sir, you have come into to the district of the Black Harvest. The people who live here, have come here, to die. We are, well, we are … kept separate from the healthy - and have been banned from normal life. Some say that we are cursed. If you are not one of us, you should probably leave."

Jon was unafraid of such things. He had heard of these communities, but had never before come upon one let alone ventured in.

“Should you not have a signpost of warning?” he asked, still mumbling from tiredness.

“Yes, Sir, there are many”, she said pointing to one, just yards away from them. It was a single stick with a scull and crossbones burnt within the wood.

He started to weep. Jonathon had never really cried like this - not even when his Ma had been buried, nor, throughout the passage of the last few days, when he had lost his father, his income, his tools, and his way. But now, in a rush, the sadness came upon him, and he wept like one who can hold the tides no more.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Communal Well

As Fatima approached the communal well, with Peter and Paul slowly lumbering along behind her, she could see a young man on the ground, lying upright with his back to the stone, fast asleep.

The warmth of the sun was accelerating, and his cap was tipped over his face: it was impossible to see his providence, or age - however his mud-soiled clothing spoke of destitution.

She hesitated at proceeding further. Perhaps it was best to turn back before he was roused to wake? Yet the dogs needed their watering, and had gone ahead of her, right up to the stranger, with their eager panting, whining and yelping enthusiastically.

“Shush” she scolded.

The two obeyed faithfully, and then returned to stand to the right and left of her. Fatima could see that the young man was watching the hounds with a broad smile on his face.

“All bones in velvet suits” he said with a tired smile.

She could see he was exhausted as he still sat there: this youth, she guessed, was but a few years older than herself, and by the look of his dark curly hair and grey eyes, there was something of the gypsy about him.

She took a stub of dried meat from her apron pocket, that she kept for the dogs and offered it to him. He accepted it gratefully. Paul appeared genuinely dismayed.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Observing

“You are observant” he said candidly.

“Yes” she said, with her gaze wandering all about him. Eve could also see the auric glow, which like a rosy sunrise rayed out some feet around him. Because of this, she did not feel afraid. A malevolent spirit could not produce an aura like this.

Puck was becoming a little unnerved by this unusual mortal - and decided there and then it would be best to make himself invisible. Moments later she was still just watching him as before, and he, her.

Once again Eve had mistaken a Fae for a ‘departed’ human spirit. Although her perception was developed, her clairvoyance had never seen the Sprites in the sunshine, the Elementals that swing from the shimmering trees, the thought-creatures that run hither and thither, the Goblins at the feet of the poker machines and the bars, the sad Elves who inhabit the libraries, the Jinn of the underground volcanoes, the Sylphs of cloud and sea, the familiars of the family pets, the fay ‘guides’ of the mediums, and the marshals of the woods and valleys - not a one.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Back Seat Dwarf

The Dwarf at the back was annoyingly kicking his seat from behind. Eve stopped the car, they had arrived outside her London flat. It was ground floor, with a basement bedroom.

They both followed her in. Puck wasn’t ready to walk away just yet, there was something about this young woman that he found mesmerising. She slumped her bag onto a broad feather filled couch and sat beside it. Her long black hair had loosened from her pony tail, it framed well her melancholy face, contrasting her pale white skin, even whiter since the afternoon’s toll. 

Although in her early thirties, Eve had never once been tempted to wear makeup of any kind. She sported a natural style, natural flair and natural grace, that truly reflected her persona from within, surrounded by an aura of natural perfection.

She had remembered all that took place now, and Puck read her thoughts (he could do this) and as it all came back to her, he could see that she saw him also. She was watching him look at her and genuinely bewildered as to who or what he might be.

He returned her stare - and, interestingly, when he changed his own eyes from brown into violet, she asked him outright, “Why are you doing that?”

Eve did not say this accusatively, it was more that she was curious and wanted to know more about the presence before her.

Puck was mildly taken aback as no other mortal had ever noticed him doing this. He ordinarily projected a ‘glamour’ about himself that presented as he would have it - and this overall impression seemed to be universally accepted, without question.

“You are observant” he said candidly.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Luck of the Irish

Puck could see distinctly the large diamond that was rolling at his feet on the floor of the vehicle where it had dropped. It had impressed radiant blue and purple sparks over his boot. Even without much light, it could speak in rainbows. He clicked open his seat belt and picked the rock up finding it heavy and cold to the touch.

Puck had heard of this stone, if it is the one he thought it might be: Irish. It was called that in recent legend, as it was said to have the ‘luck of the Irish’ - i.e. none. This stone had a reputation for bringing bad luck to whoever held it … and the car crash (now averted) seemed to confirm it.

He, on the other hand, was not at all worried by its powers of ill. Puck had magic bags for such things, that, with a nuclear force, could contain any Jinn, Sprite, or hazardous Diamond, if need be, indefinitely.

“Now I have saved you twice”, he said, well satisfied with himself.


-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

A Happy Finding

The basket itself could not be refurbished, for the smell lingered, and so Jonathon then made a fire, breaking the woven cane with a few snaps, and in doing so, he saw glinting in the firelight beside - a piece of gold that had been caught in the weave had now loosened and dropped to the dirt. It was an earring.

He turned it over in his hands - it was wonderfully fashioned. A golden hoop with a cast of blue Sapphires. It occurred to him that its golden partner might be buried where he had lain it, but the thought of digging up the head did not feel proper, however tempting. He carefully lay the earring onto a sieve and washed it in the trough, with a final rinse of what was left of his drinking water. He then solemnly placed it through the hold in his ear, and snap, it fitted perfectly. Well pleased with his find, and how his prospects had changed, he settled onto his bed and slept soundly til dawn.


-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

     

Burying the Stranger's Head

With the arrival of the laggard slave-master, Jonathon had one more reason, a very good reason, to move on. Isabelle had taken his tools, and a life in service to this heathen would be torturous indeed - to both himself and to those he facilitated. Perhaps Jamaica?

If I persist on this roundy-bout, he said to himself, I shall then be slave to them also - and so, all told, I needs must go. And that was that.

As the sun began to fade, Jon took a flat thin piece of iron and used it to dig a hole beneath the fir tree - but the roots beneath resisted, and so he gave up, and moved to the vegetable patch instead, where the soil had been worked, and therein he tipped (now in the half dark) the stranger’s head. He dutifully said a few prayers whilst laying the covering soil, and placed a cross made of two branches twined above, to deter anyone else from digging there.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Strangely at Peace

Alystraea 

“I have come to ask you if you would prefer to return … there is a way back into the Earth - if you and your daughter would like to come with me.”

A small tear glistened in the Grandmother’s eyes.

As he has asked this all important question, Patricia saw her life play out right before her, and also, that of her young child’s. It wasn’t the usual review of things past, but of those events which were yet to be.

Without hesitation, both she and her toddler took his outstretched hands, and before any time had passed, they were back in their family wagon driving past the very intersection where they had been curtailed before.

They kept driving until arriving home. Molly was asleep in her ‘safety seat’ and Patrica carried her into her cot. She had a thunderous headache, yet felt strangely at peace. All she could think of was, what should she prepare for dinner?

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Staring Eye to Eye

“Mama, what is that funny man doing?” Molly asked, looking over her mother’s shoulder at Puck who was waving at them.

Her Grandmother had seen him also, but had decided to keep it to herself.

Patricia turned around and suddenly Puck was staring eye to eye, so closely she could feel his gaze. He had an enormous cowboy hat and violet eyes. He could change the colour of his eyes at will, and found violet very persuasive. She felt that she could trust him.”

“Are you a long lost relative?” she asked.

“No, nothing like that,” he hurriedly said - as the seconds afforded him were few. Even though the time ratios were completely apart from the material world, it was important to be speedy, nonetheless.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Procuring Consent

This Master Elf - a.k.a Hode - had managed to hold time back long enough - a mere ninety five seconds - to enable embedding himself into that early sequence of moments, just prior to the hideous calamity.

Interfering with time can be tricky. The Elvish can do this within their own world very easily, but the laws of the Physical world requires cooperation between all parties - which in and of itself takes more time again to manage also.

Only an adept can understand and convene with those involved in such a chaotic scene - its a little like unravelling a rug of knitted squares, and knitting them back up again, without having a fibre out of place when all is done.

The essential part for success is procuring consent. The young mother and her child needed to want to come back into the World for this to work at all. If had they been content to stay in the spiritual worlds, Puck could not have made the difference as he did.

Equally, if Eve herself had wanted the accident to play out as it had happened, he would have difficulty changing her role as well.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

The Adjacent World

Puck by all appearances on this day looked like a man - a very tall man, with a mess of long curly hair. He was dressed in Western gear - having just come from the country in outback Australia. He liked to pop over there once or twice a week to visit family - the stadium had just been a little detour on his way through.

Most of the time Puck resided in the adjacent world - that subtle and wonderful etheric place called Faerie.

Nothing in Faerie ever goes rancid, the air is always sweet and clean, and there is a fresh supply of water and moss where ever you go. Being so much more pleasant, it was the obvious choice as the primary place for Puck to prefer to live in, and drink the water from.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Time & Consequences

Puck positioned himself into the front seat beside Eve, quickly throwing Needles abruptly into the back.

“There you go Einstein”, he said rather sarcastically, having viewed the akashic take on how and what had just taken place: with Needles distracting the driver, causing the car to crash, spin and collide.

“You really should be more careful” he then said, addressing Eve, not realizing that she could see and hear him.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Gold Mercedes

Best beat the traffic before the crowds disassemble. Puck teleported himself into the car park, right beside his gold Mercedes. Once inside he chugged down a half opened packet of crisps before venturing out onto the open road. Oh! life was grand!

Next he was rummaging into the side door for his Etheric springwater (he never drank tap water as it could turn his hair green) when he came to a slowing in the traffic, as a police officer was waving the line of cars into a side street instead.

Puck swung over before turning. He wanted to see what the delay was, and if he could help. His powers of healing were as good as the best, and besides which, his curiosity responded quickest to the fates of disarray.

And that was how Puck met Eve; on a day that should have been the worst day of her life, but for him. He wandered into a scene of metal and blood, and simply, quite brilliantly, turned back time.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Man! You have it good!

Puck looked over the sea of souls before him - a vast stadium of sports supporters were before him - divided in name and colour only. He enjoyed visiting such events - he found that the energetic resonance was exhilarating. If only they could cheer like this for something of substance, of real importance, he thought momentarily.

It was essentially the paradox of Humanity: the gift to be able to get things completely wrong, to miss the point, to choose unwisely, to falsely judge, to assume the worst, to see through the glass darkly, to misinterpret and misunderstand … the divine right to be an ignoble ass - or, to become a god - Man! You have it good!

But he knew better. His elven ears were twitching with the erupting noise. The scoreboard clicked - and the animated mass explosively enlivened one more time.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Selfhood

There was magic in the air, everywhere: an intoxicating normalcy, where the consciousness of Man could pivot one minute from an inner knowing, into a selflessness that drew him into the crowd, and then back again.

The problem of selflessness can be when the soul of the individual fails to recognize the light that dwells in his brother, because he then no longer perceives the glory of his own. There needs to be a measure of self, a large portion of self, to be able recognize and respect the selfhood in others.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

It Wasn't Me!

“It can’t be me.
I would not have done this.
It can’t be me.
I would not have done this.”

Eve kept repeating this over, and over, as the shock loosened her thinking terribly.

The dwarf had left her recollection altogether, and their momentary conversation was far from her reach also. This is not unusual, for many of us have visitations from ethereal beings and completely forget it having happened hours, or even minutes later. We also have interjections and suggestions that interrupt our inner dialogue, frequently from an ethereal other - sometimes of goodwill, and sometimes with animus.

All Eve could remember, scanning back, reviewing what she knew, was looking down at her phone, away from the road.

“Oh God, it was me” she said just before collapsing.”

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

No longer Calf to the Bull

“Rough work is all I require Son. If it has burs and knicks, all the better I say. You worry too much lad. Crude and strong, I’ll be back on the return. If you need the raw supplies, I will arrange a drop.”

It was clear that the slaver would not take ‘no’ for an answer, and it occurred to Jonathon that he himself might end up shackled to his work, or onsold, or both. He had known five minutes of freedom, only to have some surrogate father step in and want to tell him what to do to fill his days.

“I will no longer be calf to the bull”, he said to himself.

And the voice of his inner man called to him to there and then, to step out of his childhood and become grown with a certainty of himself, according to himself.

Jon closed his eyes, and reflected on what it was to be him.

He could decide - he could choose - he could stay or he could go … and just by knowing this was his to ponder, he felt the freedom of his living spirit within, rising above, aloft the heavenly powers, now to endure all else.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Slave Trader

William Allan

“Smithy!” an oily voice called loudly.

Jon knew this voice, and it made him sick to his stomach just to hear it. It was Husain - a thug from the port - employed as ship’s whipper on cargo boats, invested in ‘crowd control’.

“I am in need of your craft” - he said, for no apparent reason with irony - then laughed a murky laugh - “we need cages - big cages … and manacles - with keys of course … and spikes big spikes.”

He went on to roll out his shopping list of his metallic requirements.

“My Da is dead, and he cannot work no more.”

“Well, you can do it Son. Good practise now you are the chief owner, I say.”

“I cannot. I know not how. I cannot.” Jon said this firmly that the oaf might hear him plainly.

Jon looked at the ground. In saying this he was lying to this hideous man. Yet even his father had refused work from the slave traders - and Jon felt exactly the same. The smell of this man was menacingly close by.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Relief

She had no recollection of what had just passed … of the car that had been forced into the tree, as she had idled into the wrong lane, absorbed in her moment, losing concentration and focus as she had done. It is the blight of the intuitive, to be less present in the present, distracted with their persistent sense of other-worldliness.

A small crowd had formed, with quite a few broadcasting the event on their phones.

Relief surged through her like a lightning bolt. There was an ecstasy of energy, as Eve discovered that her body was unharmed, and she uncurled from the tangle of metal, as a whole and healthy woman as before. It was a miracle.

And then, then, the scene became complete: and she saw for the first time the other half of this story: there was a man sitting in the gutter crying, and a wagon up against a tree. It was on fire.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Impact Shock

With the shock of the impact, Eve’s clairvoyance kicked in, and she could see Angels all around her. In that moment she thought that it was herself that had died.

Needles had escaped back into the seat behind, and was looking on the floor of the sedan for the diamond Eve had dropped with the impact.

A man in a blue uniform with an upturned moustache rattled her side door frantically until it opened, and leant across, shining a light into her eyes, then fitting a brace around her neck, he spoke something - but she did not hear what it was that he had said. Eve was taken by his golden aura, and the angelic beings that hovered at his shoulders in a flurry.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Into the Light

“What do we do now?” Patricia asked her mum, who sympathetically was holding her hand.

“Let me take you home. We have a lot to catch up on. You can rest there, and Molly can settle. In a few days, you will feel like new.”

Patricia felt the peace of these words, and her mother’s presence calmed her. She did not feel stressed or particularly broken - and that in itself was soothing too. She nodded, turning her mind’s eye away from the world she had just left, gathered up her little one, and followed her mother slowly into the light.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

All my Fault

Toby sat hunched on the curb-side with his head in between his legs. It was as though the weight of the news was literally crushing him. He did not go to his wife’s car - or what was left of it. He was not moving. He could not move.

Even though Patricia was ‘in spirit’ and no longer alive, she could hear and smell and see what was going on, as though it was close by her. She could taste the petrol on the road, and heard a woman in the background crying, she could see the other vehicle jammed up against the hedgerow with some small figure sitting in the back.

“It's all my fault” the woman was screaming, “I was looking into my phone; I just did not see it coming.”

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

World's Collide

Molly looked around. Her birth mother, in spirit form, had been holding her all this time while her grandmother, who was also in spirit, was talking with her.

“It was a terrible accident my dear, but you are alright now, I promise", she said for what felt like the fiftieth time.

“Cars can be like that” she continued explaining - “one minute you were in the world, and the next you can be taken out of it.”

The toddler pushed her head into her mother’s shoulder, wrapped her arm around her neck and clung tight. She started crying again.

“It’s the shock of it all” her grandmother said to her daughter, who was staring into a worldly window where she could see her husband at the scene of the crash. His own car had just pulled up behind the police van, and the ambulance had turned off its lights, resting there, waiting for the Coroner to appear.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Starting Over

“My life is over” she wailed.

“No, no my dear, it’s really not. You have to just pick yourself up and start again.”

Her life as she knew it was over.

Starting again meant the whole reincarnation and being a baby again - a long protracted time of feeding and crawling, and walking, and, with God knows what type of parents.

“I am so sorry that it came to this”, the voice soothingly said.

“It's just that … that I thought I would have more time.”

“We all think that, whether ninety - or two."

“But I was only two, and my mother loved me very much.”

“Yes, I know dear, she did. And she is with you right now.”

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Staring at the Basket

Robertus was not a kind man: he did what he could, he maintained his family as best he might - however, he was not loved, for he was rarely loveable.

His wife Isabelle, was considerably younger. She was not Johnathon’s mother, but a substitute, being his second wife after the early death of the first wife who passed from a rupture to the stomach, that came from a blow from Robertus.

When Jonathon returned home he found that Isabelle was gone. She had left behind a note and a loaf of cake.

Exhausted, Jon sat beside the pitted bench, staring at the basket with the unknown head inside.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Costly Money

The horses had all died - not one pony, mule or nag, remained. It was a disease that no one understood, and so everyone thus attributed their deaths to bewitchment.

The village of Farnham was small, and the one and only metal-smithy would clean his tools in the trough nightly - the same trough that the horses would drink from when coming to be fitted for shoes. Eventually the lead in the water from the shoes had poisoned each and every one of them.

Without the income from the horse shoe manufactory Jonathon’s father, Robertus, had tried to supplement the family’s fare with counterfeit coin. He would work on his marvellous imprints forged in tin alloy, weathering each with a dint and a scratch, for added authenticity. He was however, in a fairly short time, caught out, when one merchant felt his purse to be too light for the contents within.

Of course it was an offence against the coffers of the King to use his portrait on tin replicas of Silver - and Robertus was consequently sentenced to death.

And so with the few pieces left over that were overlooked in the confiscation, Jonathon had set out to redeem his Father’s head after it had been excised.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Two Huge Fellows

These two huge fellows [Mastiffs] had been bequeathed to her a few years before from a dying man to whom she had tended to in his final hours; however, the man had survived the pox, and with his renewed life, had decided to go on an adventure, leaving behind his chickens and his dogs.

Fatima would have preferred the chickens but the neighbour had collected them in stay of the rent still owing. To whit, the warmth of these giants kept her alive throughout the long nights, and secure in their protection, and so she was ever grateful for his parting gift.

Each wore a thin bracelet of silver around one ankle, where their name was inscribed in cursive script. Both had had their tails clipped and wore neck-chiefs made from leather. Each had a black raven tattooed inside one ear. Paul was blind (thus his name) and Pete was lame.

The butcher would bring Fatima his bonemeal, which she would mix with the grain. They were her only family, and she loved them well.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series

Peter & Paul

It was in the early hours of the morning when Fatima woke to go about her chores. The cold air bit her neck as she unwound her night scarf and replaced it with her worn woollen shawl. The stone floor beneath her feet was glazed with frost, and the hearth was cold, bereft of its usual succouring warmth.

At the age of fourteen Fatima had been weakened with a heart condition, and two years later, her lips were mostly a shade of blue … yet this morning they were grey and soon to blush with the dawn.

“Up!” She called in command to her sleeping dogs.

Obstinately both stayed draped upon her small straw mattress. The hay there was regularly exchanged to then become fodder for the cow, although soured by the canine scent, flattened with the weight of her mastiffs, who lay on its blanket in a tangle of limbs and slobber.

Fatima tugged on the covers to wake them, and then, when that did not move the hounds, she pulled the blanket abruptly from under them. Pete groaned, Paul slept on.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series