Fiery Fryery

Pablo Carlos Budassi

THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE

MOVED AN INCH TO THE LEFT

AND NO ONE NOTICED

- Klutz - 

This was now the third fryery burned to the ground - the hot oil would catch, and before Tindle knew it, the building from within, was alight.

“Thank the gods nobody’s been hurt.” Parrot spluttered.

It had been Parrot who had fallen asleep coddled in a whisky doze oblivious to the heat.

“Only for minutes I tell ye, no longer I say.”

It had taken just minutes to ignite. Tindle was exasperated.

“Perhaps you need a female understanding of the kitchen itself” Parrot had said edging back … he wanted to take his leave, as he saw the fury rising in his master like a secondary fire.

“You may go.”

Women were scarce for employment - all of the good ones were with family or imbedded in households already. Nathanius would have to look further from his coastal village to find one suitable.

It was a good plan. And so taking action a week later Tindle rode out on his long haired mare who equalled his height, being the tallest of the town … she, all colours, with a white diamond on her forehead.

In his satchel were two baked salted potatoes now cold, elegantly wrapt in the waxed paper from his chippery, and coddled again in a satchel of vellum.

Some said that the potato had no goodness within, because it was covered all over in the evil eye, and for this they would not touch it. Yet they were commonly eaten along the coast; stored and brought in, by the ships that travelled, and used for their own meals onboard.

When Tindle had dressed them in oil, and cooked them thusly as the stranger had instructed, the people could not see the eyes - and when seasoned, their happiness became tenfold.

What knowledge has a slave of the kitchen? Perhaps none. He thought over the problem repeatedly and at each turn of his mind decided the inevitable: a wife, this is what he should get - a wife. For as a wife she would be trustworthy, and bound to his household, and a fine long-term prospect for the chippery.

-Gabriel Brunsdon, Finding Self - Second Guesses- Azlander Series